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Just so you know the main character in this story is a guy amd he's supposed to be somewhere between 16 and 18 years old, I guess, but I haven't thought of a name for him yet.
Anyways, here's the story:

I sat down at my seat.
A few minutes later, the waitress came around.
"Hello, my name is Kelly and I'll be your waitress today." She said in a bubbly, happy voice, the complete contrast of how I feel right now. "What would like today, sir?"
"Umm...a coke, and some raviolis." I said, hoping I didn't sound as upset or as bleak and confused as I felt.
She wrote it down on a notepad, said a genuine sounding "thank you", turned and walked off.
I sat there, waiting patiently.
I really needed something nice for everything's that's been going on.
I needed a night to just eat and relax and not worry about the freaky things that have been happening to me.
Emphasis on Freaky.
As I waited, I glanced through the menu just to see if there was something better than the food I'd already chosen, and to pass the time. I didn't really care if there was anyway, because ravioli was my favorite food, and tonight was just about me enjoying a simple restaurant meal - nothing more, nothing less.
I flipped through the menu faster now, hardly glancing at the choices, as hunger suddenly flared in my stomach.
I looked at the clock, and even though it had only been a few minutes, I couldn't help being annoyed and thinking, "Come On. Where Is she?"
I started tapping my foot, getting impatient, striking the floor so hard that people at other tables glanced up to see what the noise was.
I grunted in annoyance to myself.
Great now people are looking! I better stop acting so fidgety. I came here so people wouldn't stare at me; I'd be just another random costumer at a fancy restaurant in the middle of the city, not the kid who's been freaking out in the middle of class, getting strange, random amounts of strength when I haven't lifted a single weight in my life, who now sits at the back of the class, and who sits alone at lunch, refusing to talk to anybody even though they always ask "what's wrong?"
So, instead of continuing my impatient foot tapping, I take a deep breath and force myself to relax, that I'll just have to wait my turn to get my food just like everybody else, even though I'm puzzled by the sudden ping of hunger.
But just then I start sweating, like someone's turned the heat up to a million degrees.
I feel faint.
I need something to drink or I'm afraid I'll pass out.
I look down, too weak to keep my head up, when I notice the glass of water that they always serve while you wait for your dinner to have something to drink in the meantime.
My throat parched, I instantly seize the glass and start gulping it down as fast as I can, as if I hadn't had anything to drink in weeks.
Feeling instant relief as the cold, clear liquid runs down my throat, but not stopping until I've finished the whole glass.
As I go set it back onto the table, I notice a middle aged balding man at a table near the wall staring at me, eyes wide in shock.
I pretend to look at other things as though nothing had happened, but when my eyes meet his and I see that he's still staring at me, I can't help but glare at him.
I mean, I know it's not everyday that you see someone suddenly go from perfectly calm, to annoyed, to sweating and chugging a glass of water like there's no tomorrow, but it's rude to stare.
And he shouldn't be looking This long at me with those huge, bug-eyed eyes.
So when I finally realize that he hasn't even registered the glare I'm sending him, I follow his bewildered gaze to my arm.
And see within a second just what it is he's been staring at.
It's my hand. And it's far from normal.
Part of my hand has turned a deep green, and it's Scaly.
I draw in a breath of shock and quickly shove my hand into my pocket.
Oh no. Not Here! Not Now!
My sudden shock making me forget all about the ravenous hunger and scorching heat I felt just a moment ago.
Abruptly, I rise from my seat and shove my other hand into my pocket just in case it's starting to change too.
Even though I'm seriously freaked out by now and want to get to the bathroom as fast as possible to examine myself, I don't want to draw attention to myself any more than I already have by running, so I walk rapidly to the men's bathroom, ignoring the few glances I get as I almost run into someone along the way.
I practically throw the door open when I finally reach it and rush over to the sinks.
My whole body is shaking by now, and I feel like I'm roasting in an oven, so I splash some cold water on my face, a small part of me hoping that when I look down at my hands, they'll be normal again.
I take a few deep breaths, trying to calm down.
And then -
I look at my hand...and see all of it covered with dark green scales, and pointed, black claws at the fingertips.
I gasp and put my other hand over my mouth - the one I hadn't checked yet - and am surprised to have it feel rough against my chin.
I'm afraid to check but knowing full well what it will look like, but feeling that Seeing it with confirm it. Confirm that I'm transforming into...I don't know what...
I slowly look down and see a mirror image of the other hand, green scaly skin and black claws.
"Oh no. No, no, no, no, No!" I groan, not even realizing that I'm saying this out loud.
Then I feel my mouth start hurting, as if I was eating food on a tooth with a cavity, but on All of my teeth.
I lean in close to the mirror and see my teeth Changing. Instead of having molars and flat front teeth, they have now transformed into large, fine pointed teeth.
I run my scaly finger across my teeth lightly, quickly discovering that they must be as sharp as a knife now, and not realizing when one of the stalls open and a man appears by my side, asking, "Hey, are you alrigh-?"
He's probably only a couple of years older than me, in his twenties, but I can't help but feel disappointed when he trails off as he finally sees me, backing away saying, "H-Hey! Get away from me you Freak!" And dashing out the door.
I feel disappointed because, without even realizing it; a small part of me hoped that someone around my age would be willing to help me. What with all the horrible things you see on the news nowadays I hoped that I wouldn't be found so...Creepy.
Then my face starts Burning and I clutching my face in agony, struggling to keep my balance.
But, wanting to find out just what it is that's happening to me I peek at myself in the mirror and see my face slowly changing into the same dark green scales as on my hand. I look at my eyes and see the colors are changing to a Yellow.
I groan as I clench my fists and Will this to stop, my eyes shut tight.
After a few very long seconds the burning has stopped, but I'm afraid to look in the mirror.
I take a deep breath, force myself to look and I'm shocked to see that my face has smooth, peach skin and that my eyes are back to their regular dark green color.
I stand there, surprised that that worked, but then shake my head.
I have to get out of here, before I start changing again.
I burst out the bathroom door and walk as fast as I can back to my seat, which isn't very fast because I start heating up again.
I sling my coat over my arm, not caring to put it on.
I grab my wallet, my hands shaking so badly I almost drop it. They're still a scaly green, but I don't care if anyone notices - I just have to get out of here as fast as possible.
I take out the first bill I see - a ten - and weakly slam it onto the table as a tip.
I feel like I'm going faint again.
By now everyone's staring, and one woman gets up to see if I'm alright.
I'm stunned to hear a growl, and then I realize that it came from me.
She looks at me confused, so I just clench my teeth - which have already changed again - annoyed, and shake my head.
I look over at the table she came from, to see what I assumed to be her husband and young son, looking at me with uneasiness, and spot a nice large steak, that's hardly been eaten.
I hear my stomach growl.
I stare at it as if in a daze.
Now? How could I be hungry Now, of all times?
My mouth starts watering as I take a slow step towards it, but I break from daze as I feel searing pain everywhere on my body.
I drop my coat and wallet in pain.
I start trying to move to the door but I fall to my knees in agony.
I feel my whole tingling as it starts changing again, and I try to stop it, but I can't.
And I know why: it's because I've been forcing this change to stop for weeks now.
In the beginning it was hardly anything and even Easy to stop, but, over time as it happened more and more, it got harder and harder to do so.
It hurts more than it ever did before, and I know that there's no stopping this transformation.
Even so, I try crawling to the door, desperate to get out of this place where all these people are watching me in awe, confusion, and fear. But I hardly move a few inches before I feel something Erupt from my lower back, something that's not supposed to be there. I felt it Rip through my skin.
By now I've changed completely and have scales all over my body.
It only takes the tiniest glance back to realize what came out of me: a Tail, covered with dark green scales as well.
But by now I'm too exhausted to even care, as I fall from my knees onto my back with a pitiful moan.
But instead of passing out, for some reason I'm still unbearably awake.
Hardly aware of my surroundings, I pray to be unconscious to be put out of this agonizing pain.
People are looking down at me, their faces filled with shock, confusion, and fear.
"What should we do with it?" Asked the woman who wanted to make sure I was alright before.
What should we do with IT? Was I not still a person anymore? Even if I have changed in the most physical way possible? How could she do such a thing?
"It? He's still a person, and he's obviously pain," said a man. "Maybe we should bring HIM to a hospital?" He suggested.
Pain!? I wanted to scream. You don't know the meaning of the Word Pain!!
"No! We don't know what the heck is going on with this freak. We should let the government or somebody else handle this!" Dismissed the young man in his early twenties who saw me changing earlier in the bathroom.
And then, all of sudden, the doors to the restaurant burst open and at least a dozen men wearing some kind of black uniforms ran in.
They all had guns.
Most of them flanked all around the room, while two of them stayed together.
What's going on?
I could only stare and watch as the two started walking towards me.
My pulse quickened.
The guy in front of me said with a laugh, "Heh! This is the great Subject 2?" He gave me a kick at which I could do nothing about but wince and groan in agony.
They all had black masks on, so I couldn't see his face.
"How pathetic."
What was he talking about? Subject 2?
Then he kneeled down and pulled out some kind of syringe.
"W-wh-who a-are you?" I managed to groan in between my short, ragged breaths, weakly.
But he ignored me and stuck the needle into scaly my hand.
I gasped as I felt it go through, somewhat expecting that it wouldn't be able to penetrate the scales. And then within an instant I saw that I couldn't move.
He stood up again, tucking the syringe away in his pocket.
I tried yelling, "Why are you doing this!?" But nothing came out.
Had the paralysis spread that quickly already?
I still breathed automatically, though.
"Hey who are you, anyway?" Shouted the same woman who turned against me.
I tried moving my eyes up to look at her, but I found that they were frozen too.
What had they given me?
"You don't need to know. But I'm sure all of you will be glad to Know that we'll take care of the problem at hand."
I heard a sigh of relief, and anger flooded through me.
"Problem at hand? Listen dude, you don't know what you're talking about. We just saw this...Human...turn into this Thing!" Commented the young twenty year old man.
He said word "human" with disgust and called me a "Thing."
It filled me with Contempt.
"We know. We saw everything that happened. And that you wanted someone else to take care of This?"
He gestured towards me.
"But he's hurt. Shouldn't he be taken to hospital to get help? Even if he's...different." Said the man who actually cared and suggested this before.
"Don't worry." Said the syringe-guy. It sounded automatic, forced even.
"He'll be taken care of." His tone was genuine and sincere sounding.
"Okay." Nodded the man. "But what are you doing with him? Why are you taking him?"
"It's a very dangerous creature. I suggest that no one else finds out about this, for it might cause a panic. As you've noticed just among yourselves."
"But he hasn't- " he looked like he was unsure about the whole "dangerous" part.
I saw some of the uniformed guards raise their guns slightly, a warning as if to say "shut up or else" and he quieted immediately.
It was silent for a while.
Then syringe-guy leaned down, picked me up (I was still paralyzed, by the way), and slung me over his shoulder like a backpack.
I don't know if I still weighed the same or not like this, but I was pretty sure that this guy was Pretty strong to be able to do something like that so easily.
Maybe they were all like that.
I was now forced to look at the ground, seeing as I still couldn't move my eyes.
Then all of a sudden I heard what sounded like all of the guards around the room file in behind me and syringe-guy, as if on a signal.
Then he marched out of the restaurant along with the rest of them.
They walked up to what I guessed would be two large vans, judging by the size of the shadows.
"Okay, you six take that ambulance and we'll take this one." Syringe-guy commanded.
I heard footsteps and doors opening.
The guy carrying me stepped inside and then suddenly I was on my back, my head hitting a cold metal slab.
I went to yell out in pain, but I couldn't so I just lied there silently.
I guess the pain shocked some of my body out of paralysis, because I was able to move my eyes around now.
There were five guys in this crowded little space, so I assumed the sixth was driving.
The van started vibrating, so I guessed we started moving.
Three of them were sitting on the metal wall-seat opposite of mine, one was standing in a space above my head, and one was occupying the rest of the space standing in the middle.
Was this really an ambulance? Were these guys really here to help me?
And, despite everything they've done to me so far, I felt a ray of hope.
The guy standing in the middle took off his mask.
He had blond hair and ice cold blue eyes.
He had a smirk on his face.
He let out an animated laugh, and just then I realized that he was the one who had stuck that needle in me.
My heart sank.
"I can't believe that they actually think we're going to Help It! Pff...ambulance, Hah!" He laughed.
The others chuckled along with him, as if they were just a group of regular guys having a good time and sharing a laugh.
I knew it started raining because I heard a pattering sound on the van.
Then one of them asked, "But, Mr. Lowman, what do we with it now?"
He gave him a questioning look.
"What I mean is; Mr. Walker doesn't want to see it just yet - he wants to observe it some more - see how it'll react in a normal environment, what it's actions are."
Who's Mr. Walker? And what do they mean by "Observe?"
"Oh. Well than why is it still here? Driver, go to that alley over there."
The paralysis was finally starting to wear off - I could barely open my mouth now.
"W-what are you - " I tried saying, my voice just a faint whisper.
I stopped, suddenly nervous, as he glanced down at me, looking a little surprised.
"Oh. I forgot that you were still there. Heh." He grinned evilly.
Suddenly he bent over and punched me across the face, causing pain to flood through me again.
I heard the back of the 'ambulance' doors open.
When I finally had the strength to look back over at him, he was grinning wickedly.
My body filled with dread.
"Come on, boys, help me take out the Trash." He gestured to the others.
Then he picked me up and hurled me out of 'ambulance', landing face-first in a puddle.
I heard them all laughing as the doors closed and they speeded away, the tires hitting another puddle that showered onto me.
But, I didn't move, as I finally fell into unconsciousness.
And so, just like that, I was out of sight, out of mind.
Just so you know, this is the first time I've ever posted something on Deviantart, let me know what you think.

P.S Is this too long for a chapter? Do I write too much? Too little?

Thanks :)
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ingmaster5 Featured By Owner Mar 3, 2012  Student Writer
Some slight Peccadilloes in spelling, and grammar (SAT words FTW!) ,but everyone has those. I'm ashamed to say that i didn't really feel very sorry for him near the end. This being because I don't know anything about him yet. You jumped straight into the action, throwing out all suspense, and a good portion of the mystery. This isn't necessarily a bad thing, and it doesn't 'need' to be changed. Not how I would have started, but then again it isn't my story. I can't wait to read the rest.
snowwhitequeen08 Featured By Owner Apr 16, 2011
Not a bad start, needs a little bit of polishing (just with some rewording really) and it'll shine really brightly. I like it a lot, great job. Very original.
saphira2k5 Featured By Owner Apr 13, 2011
Don't think that I wrote this and just stopped okay? But should I put the next chapter into parts so it won't feel so overwhelming
saphira2k5 Featured By Owner Apr 13, 2011
Just so you know, I've been working on chapter which I think is going to be significantly longer than this one.
alexmgorman15 Featured By Owner Apr 12, 2011
Hmm, not bad. You got talent
saphira2k5 Featured By Owner Apr 12, 2011
Thanks :)
alexmgorman15 Featured By Owner Apr 12, 2011
Hmm, not bad. You got some talent
clashmecha Featured By Owner Apr 6, 2011
Nice work, you're a pretty good writer.
The only things I could see wrong with this were the few spelling errors and a couple of gammar mistakes.
But apart from that brilliant work ^_^
saphira2k5 Featured By Owner Apr 6, 2011
Thanks :)
SpiritedDreaming Featured By Owner Apr 5, 2011  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Hmm. It's an interesting concept, and I'll be looking forward to the next chapter It's a good length too, so you don't need to worry about that. As long as it doesn't take like 30 a4 pages, it should be good. I'm of the opinion that around 15 pages is probably the maximum for one chapter. But that's my opinion.

Yeah, just going off what others have said, I admit to thinking that you were going to tell us what was wrong at first, but decided against it, but I suppose that made me keep reading, because I wanted to know what the problem was.
Also, work on your paragraohs a bit, just to tidy the page up and link together important sections of the story. And you do need to think about what peoples reactions to someone changing into something like an alligator or a dragon in the middle of the restaurant, and then having armed men storm in, would be like.

But overall, a decent story and an interesting concept. I'll keep an eye out for the next chapter.
Shad0wf1re Featured By Owner Apr 5, 2011
I like it. Whos subject 1 or 2 and tis reminds me of the time I escaped from that Insanity Ward.....
lisawins Featured By Owner Apr 5, 2011
I like the story; though sometimes your grammar is a bit off.
Maybe just proof read through sections, read it back to yourself and maybe you'll see what I mean? Paragraph it like previous people have commented.

I like the concept tho :) - makes me think of Doc Conners in Spiderman lol - I'd like to know what happens next!
4evrRoses-N-Thorns Featured By Owner Apr 3, 2011
Its good, though it'd be easier to read in paragraphs :) wonder what he's turning into:? welcome to :devart:
saphira2k5 Featured By Owner Apr 5, 2011
Thanks for commenting :)
4evrRoses-N-Thorns Featured By Owner Apr 6, 2011
your welcome:) care to read my ch.2:? its my most recent deviation
saphira2k5 Featured By Owner Apr 6, 2011
I already did lol
4evrRoses-N-Thorns Featured By Owner Apr 7, 2011
thanx :)
AmyATOMIC-x Featured By Owner Apr 2, 2011  Hobbyist General Artist
I read this all he way through but I've gotta say it was hard. It seems like each sentence has it's own line which just doesn't make it flow very well. When you write, you should group sentences together in paragraphs, you go onto a new paragraph either at the beginning of a new person speaking, or when the topc flow changes slightly.

The concept overall was really good though, it made an interesting read. I want to know what they mean by Subject 2 :).

beowolf24 Featured By Owner Apr 3, 2011
The point was to make suspense inside the story. To name something a number implies that they have lost both meaning and value as what they were. Now they are whatever number you gave them and it is more then likely that if he is two there is a few more of his kind out there, though I doubt that they are exactly like him. However it would disprove the testing of group test to study the effects of a weapon or virus.
AmyATOMIC-x Featured By Owner Apr 3, 2011  Hobbyist General Artist
Oh I see :).
Thanks for that aha.

beowolf24 Featured By Owner Mar 31, 2011
Good length, but they are right that a paragraph every so often might be nice. From the way you wrote it though I would guess he is a were-gator. My only problems was with the reactions of the men. They are clearly mercenary, but they question thing. On top of that everyone in the restraint seemed like they had seen a group of men with guns just march right in to a boy who is growing extra limbs.
So question have you ever seen someone with a gun before because I have and I can tell you that in that moment I was more terrified then I had ever felt in my life. So unless the restraint is consistently stormed all the time there is a garentee that someone is going to freak out.
Over all though it is a good read so far, but the first part left the reader almost put off because it felt like you were going to tell us what was going on, but waited. I rather like the idea of a changing of feelings throughout the story.
Semi-Charmed137 Featured By Owner Mar 23, 2011  Hobbyist General Artist
This is pretty interesting. I'd love to see more. Sounds like he's turning into a dragon, dragon's are cool.

:) I can't wait to find out what they mean by 'Subject 2'.
NannaDoodles Featured By Owner Mar 22, 2011  Student Traditional Artist
u did not write too much, it has an interesting story but...there are quite a few errors and i think you could have buffed out the writting a bit, your details were good but to frank and easy to classify, try molding yourself into the char more and it should get better, over all i like it, just try to be more abstract about the feelings he has, try to bring his confusion out a bit more, it would set a very good feel to the story if only you just put a bit more details on his actual thougts and mind, try to imagine him as a real person and try to thank of his likes and dislikes within your story when writting, so that he will seem not only real to you but the reader :) congrats on your first deviation
HaydenTheDemon Featured By Owner Mar 22, 2011  Hobbyist Writer
All right, so I read your story as I promised. I like how you intrigue the reader because I can sense his distress, and it seems about the normal size for a chapter; look at mine for example.

I would combine some things into paragraphs instead of leaving them in single sentences and starting a new one on the next line. I did have a question about how long this been going on to the guy though...
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